- Let me just start this week’s column by drawing your attention to this.
Apparently this administration is so anti-gun control that they cannot even manage to keep a
handle on their own personal firearms. This is, as they say, “Comedic gold.”
I am writing to you for the heart of the Northeast Blizzard of 2006. The snow has managed to
cover the graffiti covered side walks, trash, and frozen homeless people in a gentle white
blanket, transforming our nation’s capital into a winter wonderland. As I left this morning I
was forced to brave at least 3-4” of snow. I felt like a Viking as I walked through the low
twenty degree weather with a sweater and vest while the rest of my co-inhabitors were
bundled up as if they were on the most grueling leg of the Iditarod. The worst part is that this
limited amount of snow has managed to shut the city down, schools were cancelled or
delayed, traffic was mess, and only the brave men and women (and their staffs) responsible
for representing you were called in for their government jobs. As far as I can tell, the city is
paralyzed by even the slightest sprinkling of snow. Good to know for anyone bent on military
conquest of D.C. in the near future. Attack after a snow storm, cause D.C. is full of pussies.
In other news, there is this fucking guy right here! There is an article attached, but this guy is
my new hero. He is giant, hairy, and pissed off. I may be crushing a little, in a Viking way.
So as WoW becomes more and more lack luster I find myself looking over my shoulder and
quasi-indulging in the Olympic craze. Yesterday while going through the motion in AQ (dot,
dot, dot, bolt, get out of LOS for big nasty AE, repeat) I was able to catch the short track
speed skating competition. It reminded a lot of Warmachine Games. Basically these guys
just cruise around until it is time to turn it on, and then it’s over. Very similar to the turn
where the Warcaster pops his feat. That is when it occurred to me that TTG’s should be an
Olympic event. It would be damn sight more entertaining then Curling. The fans will cheer
for some lame shit at the Olympics, it shouldn't be hard to get them behind dorks. I could
just see the scandals now. The player for Belgium was actually 3 points over, or injuries
rocked the Chinese team as they all got food poisoning from bad onion rings. The new face
of America would fat and scrawny guys all trying to fit into the dame sized tee shirt. Their
strict regiment of caffeine and cheetos would prepare for the grueling Olympic season.
Maybe we could get GW to sponsor it? They have more money then god. Or maybe not,
since they feel a need to implement annual price hikes.
Speaking of GW, I started painting my Behemoth orcs this week. As I watched the paint
make love to the model (yea, it was hot) I could not help but revisit the notion that there are
so many more quality products out there for TTG players. GW no longer sets the standard,
they are found lacking. Periphery companies such as Rackham and Privateer Press really
are the way of the future. Their games are quick and easy, or dirty, which is what the casual
gamer is looking for. Their models stand alone, and only hard core converters like Momma,
feel a need to fuck with them. And whilst the hard core gamer will spend as much on these
games armies as a WH/WHFB army, you don’t have to. I used to think that there was
nothing cooler looking then a fully painted GW army, however I now see that I was incorrect.
A vast scale mini game like Flames of War makes GW games armies look tiny. Something
bigger and cooler then a GW game completely kills my drive, as if I require command of an
army, I should look no further then the impressive looking spread that the smaller mm
games provide. A well painted Warmachine or Confrontation war band allows for originality,
and time to make each miniature stand out.
Thus I put it to Da Boyz and others to start the revolution. The only reasons I can figure for
the price hikes are 1.) GW needs to increase costs to maintain profit margins due to lack of
sales or 2) the quality of manufacturing, be it materials or aesthetics, is increasing. I am
gonna bet it is the former. Keep buying your jacks and samurai gobbos. Eventually GW will
realize that they need to step it up, stop producing linear and static crap with an exceptional
mini thrown in the mix, and start providing the gamer with a product worthy of what they are
paying for. Perhaps then GW can start using its powers for good. Imagine a world, my
fellow dorks, where you can play a game with minis that look like Rackham’s, costumer
service that is on par with the Privateer guys, and nationwide support like GW has. This is
my dream. Will you join me in this dream?
Well I am off to work on something to do about VD tomorrow. A wet tee-shirt contest is
romantic if you don’t enter you fiancé right?
